Thoughts behind each part:
Preparation:
Rather than present everything we have written in the report, we would like to take this chance to bridge the gap of our report. Our team forcus more on the implementation plan and the evaluation of the benefit and the solution during our presentation. We prepared a detailed chart to show how our plan will be implemented if it is applicable.I was in chage of the background and the purpose statement of our project.
Delivery:
As I was the first speaker of our formal presentation after Wee Boon's brief introduction of our group, I decided to start with a short story about myself. Although it sounded a bit off from our topic-orientation participation rate, i still used it because I would like to bring the point that the importance of your network in college life, and orientation is the first and very crucial panel for your network.
Inside the background, I choose to give out all the basic knowledge about O week, I hope with this all the audience can get a clear picture about what O week really is. Secondly, I narrow down the O week background to Faculty of Science, because due to the complexity of the O week itself we focused our study on the case of FoS. Thirdly, I mention the problems of the current O week programme, and which part we are going to target in our project. Lastly, I state our project statement, I do not want to illustrate too much on the statement, because in my opinion keeping it clean and tiny is a way to help the audience memorize the key points.
Slides:
I put in all my key points inside the slides, but I try to avoid the wordy problems. As most of us know, sometimes we may think something others when listening to a presentation. When the audience's thought comes back, I do hope there are still some points he could catch up.
Strength:
I would like to compare myself with the "past me". I could feel I improved a bit after the peer teaching session, during the presentation, I moved less, spoke louder and pronounce a bit clearer than before. I interacted with my slides, because I hoped the audience could get the key points I put into the slides. My gesture and eye contact improved a bit. And I did not memorize my script, I held the notes in my hand but I just randomed took a glance rather than read it.
Weakness:
1. My tone is still a problem, for some words I could not pronounce very clearly, I need to practice more.
2. I tried to make the background crystally clear, however, it is still a bit under my expectation, I got some points inside my mind, but I just could not explain it clearly enough due to the language limitation.
3. When I was nervous, I will blink too much. So did in the presentation.
4. I needed more eye contact with the audience.
5. I said something irrelevant when I could not get the correct words for the question.
All in all, I could see my improvement along the way. However, I needed to spend more effort on improving my presentation skills, both verbal language and body language.
Hi you.. :)
ReplyDeleteFirstly -> "we may think something others when listening" => "may be thinking of something else"??
Anyway. I do think you have improved quite a bit. Well done. =D You seem to be more comfortable although at times you do let your limitation with the language hinder you presenting your points. Your delivery was good. Volume was appropriate and the pace of your speech was just right. You mentioned that you thought your tone was a problem. I think however, the tone was fine just that you kept stalling as you tried to remember the words you wanted to use. I don’t think you should let the use of the language restrain you presenting. A presentation is about bringing across your ideas and providing a clear picture of what you are addressing. If using simpler, less complex words would allow you to do this more effectively I think you should. Presentations are not judge by how well you speak but no how well you speak your mind. This is something a lot of us forget at times and try to impress our audience and end up forgetting what we actually needed to say. Otherwise I felt that you were vocally engaging and did rather well.
The thing about holding something and not using it, or using it very seldom, makes it look redundant and therefore unnecessary. If you only required those few words to prompt you and put you back on track, they [the points] could have been crafted into your slides. I feel that it would be better to turn around to check with your slides then to lift a piece of paper and end up distracting the audience. Eye contact was a bit lacking. If I’m not mistaken, most of the time you were either looking at the ceiling or the back of the room (not sure if it was at Brad).
The thing is no one knows what you are going to say when you are going to say. So most of the time is it ourselves who create that stress and pressure we feel when presenting. Thinking about what you are going to say before you actually say may help. Language doesn’t necessary be the obstacle you are facing but the living up to what you wish you could do. One step at a time I’d say. :)
To sum up, I think you did a great job despite all you thought you did wrong. To stand up in front of a class and present in a language you don’t usually use takes a lot of courage and I applaud that. I think I would have more difficulty presenting anything in Chinese!!!! Well done and keep it up!! :)
P.s if you ever need any help with language you can ask. :)
Hi Garfield :D
ReplyDeleteThank you for your presentation. Overall, I think your team presented well and I can very much understand your proposal. It was a viable implementation plan.
Regarding the presentation, I found myself asking what is the problem again and is it a valid problem that must be solved. The emphasis may be lacking in this department.
Yi Tong, you started off with a good projection of voice. Your tone was neither jarring nor high. It was pleasant. I think it was great to start with anecdote, your personal introduction and relate it with your proposal. I have to say certain anecdotes may be off topic but yours was good and relevant.
You spoke with confident and poise and these portrayed competency and reliability on your part. I felt I am able to trust you in implementing the plan.
There are few notes from me for which I hope you will reflect with an open heart and mind. :D
1. You were distant, away from us rather than unto us. In contrast, Johnathan came forward and I felt I have to be receptive to him.
2. You didn’t look at us (as though we are not good looking enough: P). Your eyes were mostly on the ceiling, on Brad and on the slides.
3. You spoke a bit too fast and may seemed to want to finish speaking than discussing the problem with us. (But you also seemed impromptu enough and that was good.)
I think that’s about it. Minor stuff would include your facial expression being a bit stiff and there was no emotion or personality coming off you. I think you have the looks and can possibly charm most people if you sharpen your skill in this area: D.
Regarding comments on your reflection, I have the following suggestions for corrections. Cheers!
“Our presentation, on behalf of Drug Inc., WAS ended yesterday.” - has
“It IS a bit hard to present YOUR two months' preparation in 25 min, but we have tried our best to achieve it.” – was, our
“Our team FORCUS more on the implementation plan and the evaluation of the benefit and the solution during our presentation.” - focus (typo error, I presume), > focused (standardization of tenses)
“…I CHOOSE to give out all the basic knowledge about O week…” – Chose
(It seemed to me that you are using present tense to describe your thoughts on your presentation. How do we go about this, Brad?)
If I remember correctly, to use secondly and thirdly, we have to start off with firstly. Do correct me if I am wrong.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHI Yi Tong,
ReplyDeleteFirstly, I liked the blouse you wore during presentation :). The pink eye-shadow suited you well; perhaps for a formal presentation in future, it'll be better to use more neutral tones? :) (just a suggestion teehee)
In terms of preparation, you guys did the right thing to focus on Faculty of Science because 'O' week is a campus-wide event. Your proposal wouldn't have been as convincing otherwise. Initially, I did not see how establishing a better social network would help bond students together. During the Q&A, you mentioned that you want NUS students to know that they are being looked after, not left alone to die...something to that effect :P...and I finally understood the reason behind some of your implementation. And I felt this point could be brought up earlier on in your introduction.
In terms of delivery, you had clear voice projection, and used a personal anecdote in your introduction to make the sharing more personal. I'd say many people noticed and appreciated that. Really nice job there!!
You articulated your words very well I felt (though you seemed to think otherwise) ; tone was varied and lively. Though you spoke a bit too fast at certain parts, I could still understand. Unfortunately, we did not get to see more of you cause you stood behind the table. It'd be even better if you stood nearer to the audience.
I agree with you! You have indeed improved from your class assignment. :) You appear more confident and engaged the audience a lot more. In your peer teaching assignment, you held back a lot, but in this presentation, I could sense a lot more excitement coming from you as you presented - it made what you said believable. :))
All the best for your future presentations! Having more practices will always make your speech better. Taking baby steps, like what you've done, is the key. Overall, I enjoyed your group's presentation! Thank you for the great effort. :)
Hi (again)
ReplyDeleteeh just a little input.
“Our presentation, on behalf of Drug Inc., WAS ended yesterday.”
I would use had ended yesterday. The choice between has and had would depend on the context of course. There is however nothing wrong with was (Brad please correct me if wrong) but it implies that a third-person was the cause of the termination of the presentation. Since you finished presenting, has or had ended would be the choice.
“It is a bit hard to present your two months' preparation in 25 min, but we HAVE tried our best to achieve it.”
This sentence is correct if you were speaking in a third person's perspective, but I think this might be confusing for the reader. However it would be "we HAD tried" because it is in the past so HAD and not HAVE. Exceptions would be when it's in the immediate past where you would say "we have tried our best" but since it has been awhile since the conclusion of the presentation it would be HAD. I'm no english expert but this is what I think.. :)
Oh and a little spacing would be nice. :) Between your secondly, thirdly and finally. It really makes reading a lot easier... =D
Now that Steph has mentioned it, I believe you wore that dress to the alumni meeting thing I saw you at right? Right? haha! :)
Hi Yitong,
ReplyDeleteCan I say your initial story about the O week really caught my attention? And I can see a strength of your presentation is how you manage to incorporate a personal element to this whole presentation. Because the story wasn't too long, it was resonably effective.
Your presentation was interesting, and if you follow it up with a sprinkling of short anecdotes along the way, it would have been even better.
One thing I noted was that you read from your slides at times, which I felt wasn't a good thing to do because the audience can read for themselves. So maybe you would like to rephrase and elaborate the information presented on the slides?
There are a couple of awkward choice of spoken words and slight grammar errors but it's alright. We are all working on improving our language.
In terms of ideas, you presented them rather effectively with your use of charts and they were also resonably clear and concise.
Lastly, I would like to encourage you, even though you are not a native speaker of english, I can see your effort and it is quite impressive. Take heart and press on to be a good presenter! Cheers!
Hey Yitong,
ReplyDeleteYou are always the first few to blog and I salute you for that. Heard that you are not feeling well. DO take care ya?
I have to agree with the rest that you need to improve in terms of eye contact. There are quite a number of instances which I observed you staring at the ceiling when you try to articulate certain words. Perhaps you were nervous?
A little more connection with the audience would definitely made the presentation more impressionable. One suggestion I have would be to take a step closer towards the audience instead of standing next to the screen. It gave me (as an audience) the feeling that you are afraid of the audience and do not want to get too "near" to us. I thought Jonathan in this case managed to "break free" from the comfort zone and stood nearer to the audience.
Besides the points mentioned, I think you did rather well in the presentation. You were appropriately dressed, you spoke loudly and confidently and the gestures was ok.
I thought the story was appropriate in your case and it is effective to bring out the idea of the importance of orientation in NUS.
Two questions about the proposal:
1) Why the 4 weeks pilot program when there is not much of significance between that and the 6th weeks program in terms of logistics since the people involved would still be the same. And I remember Jonathan mentioning that NUS Business School already has this program right? Then, I feel that there is really not a need to reduce it to a 4 weeks one.
2) Since it is a module that everyone has to take and there is a "grade" given, why not make it a "half-mod" whereby 2 modular credits are given. I am sure the students will appreciate the module more.
Dear Yitong,
ReplyDeleteWow! You've generated so much useful feedback with your very complete reflection. I appreciate your effort looking back on your work and completing all of the various components of the project, including the very fine presentation. I've already given input on the formal assessment, but allow me to say one more time how happy I was to see the huge improvement you made over the earlier presentation. You demonstrated excellent confidence, very good control of the topic at hand, and good delivery skills. Sure there were some weaknesses, but recognizing those and going forward is part and parcel to the learning process.
On the language issue mentioned by Daniel, yes, it should be "our presentation ended yesterday."
Good luck on your next presentation!
@Daniel:
ReplyDeleteThank you very much for your applauding~~~~haha, I do appreciate for your nice feedback, as this encourages me quite a bit and I could try to do sth better next time. :)Haha, don be so QIAN XU about your chinese, you could do it if you really take a chinese module from ARTS.haha, I do appreciate for your help all along the way~Again, thank u for everything!
@Yong Xin: Thank u very much for your feedback...haha, maybe I am too nervous to notice that there is sth wrong with my eye contact....haha, no la~this has nothing to do with gd looking or not~
ReplyDeleteBecause I remembered last time I kept moving, I wanted to correct it this time. So I did not forcus enough on the other parts, I also felt my own story is a bit off...however, thank godness jonathan helped me to link back in the end~haha
about the past tense thing, because I want to use present tense to write everything...just prevent the grammer mistakes in a simplier way~haha
Again,thank u very much for your comments!
@Steph:
ReplyDeleteDear Steph~~~OMG~~~hahaha I want to hug u through my screen~~because i really appreiciate that finally sb noticed my make up and blouse~~~~hahahahahahahha
Well, yeah I do agree I am still hold a bit back and I even did not notice I stood behind the table!!!hehe, I shoudl stay calm enough to notice everything. Hehe, because in the QA session, I finally get some chance to relax and when I relax, some sparks will appear inside my mind~haha~~hope u r satisfied with my answers~
Thank you very much again for your comments!
Gd luck for your coming exam~
@You Sheng,
ReplyDeletewow wow~I am a kind of moved after reading your comments~~haha thank u very much for your comments on my short personnal story~~~thx thx thx for catching my pointy and my thought! Want to shake ur hands~~~
Yeah I could not agree more with the point which I could improve, I will keep this in mind and apply for my next presentation.
Hehe, thank u very much for your encourage about my language~haha I won disappoint u and i will try my best~haha
gd luck for your coming exam--s!
@Daniel:
ReplyDeleteHaha you are my linguistic teacher~hahahaha
@Stanley:
ReplyDeleteThank you very much for your comments about my presentation part~~haha, I did need to improve for the eye contact...next time I could not be so nervous haha
while answer to ur question:
1. It seems does not have a lot of difference between 4 weeks and 6 weeks. However, when coming to excecutive work, it makes a big difference. For the first 4 weeks of a sem we all know that we have seldom get CA or test, besides, this is the period that both the students and the professors are not very busy, they could spend extra effort on this. However, when coming to the middle of the sem, namely before recess, student will have numerous CAs and school life suddenly became busy based on our experience. Therefore for the first pilot thing, we only implemented a four week module.
2. While we have considered about the credit thing, however, NUS biz school, who is currently implementing this module to BIZ student, did not provide MCs to their students. So if our plan is applicable, it is a bit unfair for the biz students who cannot get the credits but for the rest they could. Therefore, we make it compulsory but no credits.
GD luck for your coming exams!
Hi Brad,
ReplyDeleteThank u very much for your positive feedback about my presentation. Hope you have seen me improving through the way, I could not say I improved the most comaring to the others, but I can feel my pace of learning through every session.
This is really a very good module for me, both from the language perspective and the academic perspective. Thank you very much~~